Stone by Stone

Using the timeless game Mancala, a one or two-player meditation on grief and loss. 

Inspired by the Hawaiian self-forgiveness prayer Ho'oponopono, I wanted to offer an opportunity for processing the grief of the loss of a loved one. Each mancala pit has an associated prompt, and the last stone you lay on your turn determines which prompt you interact with:

• I love you. An opportunity to share what the person and the relationship means to you.
• Thank you. An opportunity to thank the person for something they did or something you appreciate.
• I'm sorry. An opportunity to apologize for something you did or didn't but should have done, or something you regret.
• I forgive you. An opportunity to release any resentment, frustration, or anger you've held towards the person.
• I remember you. An opportunity to share a memory or detail of the person or your time together.
• You are with me. An opportunity to share the person's lasting impact on your life or something that reminds you of them.

There is no winning or losing—only the act of remembering, honoring, and letting go.

Printable PDF mancala playing mat available if you don't have a physical copy of the game.